"Never before has a generation so diligently recorded themselves accomplishing so little." - Unknown - 

My fight with social media actually started the moment I put myself on there. A world that was too beautiful to be true from the very beginning. People sharing their 'Highlights' of life. As time continued, more people didn't only show their Highlights but also their struggles. But with all the beautiful movements (Anxiety; #Meetoo ... etc) it became a place where people show themselves off. Not necessarily always in a positive way.

Unconsciously my mind absorbed it all like a sponge desperate for water. It became an addiction, not only social media but my smartphone itself became an addiction. I catch myself looking at my phone, autotuned to look at it every hour. The urge for something, deep inside of me that is...? Afraid to miss out?

When I started becoming more mindful of my life on my phone a year ago I decided to cut it down. A path with so much resistance was and still is ahead of me. Questions rushing and collapsing in my mind driving me slowly mad. How can something so insignificant take over one person's life? Missing out on the beautiful life that is here, in our present time?

Deciding to officially delete my two Instagram accounts was like removing a piece of my soul. It felt as though I was deleting what I considered my identity. THE PLACE where I not only shared my creativity but also who I was, defining myself by the way I portrait myself on this platform. 'This is who I am'.
My mind is constantly thinking about making a new account. About new content. About all the people around the world that I would like to follow because... Because... they inspire me? Because I think that their lives are more interesting than mine? Because their photos are so on point? But in the meantime, unknowingly, I started thinking unwell of my own self.

Two and a half weeks ago I took the leap and cut out Instagram. And it already has been life-changing. I suddenly realized the importance of staring and not doing anything besides looking outside. I started creating again. Content that just came up in my mind without the need of inspiration from an online platform. That gave me confidence and great joy. While I am in France nature became more and more my playground again. Childish feelings and emotions having a place to outburst again and come to action.

Needless to say everyday my mind still thinks about picking up my phone without a reason. It thinks about the people I want to follow, but also what the best way is to keep myself safe. And these are questions I don't have real answers too. I love Instagram, Pinterest, and YouTube but I feel like I am afraid. Because in a day I will go back to the Netherland. A world that is filled with materialism, distraction, and no real beautiful nature. That my being can't resist it.

For now, I will keep going, like Mark Manson say's "Even when we think we know what we are doing we actually never know what we are doing". I will keep doing yoga, meditations and not being on social media. Literally just going with the flow. Letting everything happen at its own pace and see where it brings me in a year. Not controlling over life. A journey on Finding what feels good.

With Lot's of love and light,
Christel Joëlle

Ps: I am just talking from my perspective. Just in my case, as I am an H.S.P I take everything in like a sponge. If I don't use it wisely I feel like I am becoming mad. But it's not all negative. It has so much positive and amazing features! Connecting worldwide! Amazing ways to get inspired, it is even an amzing place to learn so much! Just for me, at this time, I need a break.

Wauw, I have been blogging for 3 years already! It hasn't been easy but I am thankful for being able to share my thought somewhere. So let's look back on this year together and see what happened.

While everyone is probably saying that this was the best year of their life I don't feel that way. This year was a process of growing up and accepting that this is happening for real and letting go.
Beginning this year I was still a student who hated school, who graduated and finally was free. I had a break for 2 months and I can safely say that that was the best time of my life. I felt free, I felt happy and I finally had the feeling everything was going to fall into place.
I made a big step to decide to start my journey further into photography. Which was definitely the best decision ever! I am a very blessed girl to be able to get the gear I thought was needed for my online study. I am still fascinated by everything in photography.

Making the decision to find a job again was probably the thing that made me the most unhappy. I have a gift for choosing jobs that have super bad organization skills... even the job I am in now is not a job I am gonna stay in for forever. I don't even earn enough now to pay my gas. It is a real struggle...

A few months ago my mother and sister found a house in the Normandië and they decided to move there. I had two options, go with them or stay here. And I still don't know what to do. I don't feel complete without them, especially me and my mother, we grew so close the past few years. We started understanding each other so much better. Sometimes it feels like our lives are parallel to each other only she is older than me.
I don't know what to do because I don't know what I could do in France, but I have the same with The Netherlands.
On the other and I want to start living by myself, but I don't have the money for it, unfortunately. But that is dream that I will try to make reality next year :)

This year was the year I experienced my most happy moments and my most depressed moments. I hit rock bottom a month ago and slowly but surely I am moving up again. I have never stopped learning from my mistakes and I don't even regret them anymore. It's true, I did things this month that I am absolutely not proud of, even though I know exactly who I wanted to be, I wasn't. I could not stand on my own two feet. I am working on that.

I wish 2017 ended with a better feeling, a better note. But it doesn't matter where I am now, as long as I keep on going forward. We all know that quote "It doesn't t matter how fast you go, as long as you keep going and don't stop'. In some way, I do agree, but stopping for a moment and get back in check with yourself is so important.

So 2018, I will keep moving forward, slowly but surely. I will keep on learning and I will find my way. This year I will focus on living my own truth, actually be my own authentic me, and working towards the life I always wanted to live.

What are the dreams you will make a reality in 2018? I would love to know!
I wish you all a happy new year!
Lots of love
Christel Joëlle

I have been watching this cat in the prairie for I guess ten minutes now. It hasn't moved, he just sits there, looking around him. Seeing something, getting up and then just sits again. Observing and listening what happens around him. His ear moved from forward to backward, his head turns slightly looking back and forth. But still sitting in the same spot. I guess his butt made it warm and he doesn't want to move anymore hihi.
Oh wait, there is action, he see's something, his focus his straight, he gets up... and nope, he sit's again. But then he hears something, his curiosity gets him moving, he stands up, moves toward the sound, one paw at the time, moving with utmost carefulness and gentleness.
My thought; what is going to be his next move now?
He is just looking, again, observing. And suddenly I only see his tail whisking in the air. Where did the rest of his body go?
What did I miss? Does he finally have its prey?
And he moves again and goes back home. Without a prey as far as I can tell.

This morning I was doing the exact same thing as this cat. I sat there, looking outside with a cup of tea. I just woke up. It was around 8 a clock ish. I saw all different kind of birds, size Small to Large. I got up but then saw another bird, I sat again. Just looking and observing nature. When most birds were in the back of the garden and I could barely see them anymore I almost started crying.
I realized again how beautiful nature is. The beautiful colors all these birds had and how they were searching for food during winter. It remembered me the time I was still in synch with nature. When I didn't care if it was cold or warm, and just went outside and walked and played outside. I miss that person in me.

This is one thing that will help me push myself to achieve my dreams more. I want to be able to live in a small house, with nature all around me, being connected again. And following my passion as a photographer and herbal medicine one day hopefully!

What pushes you toward your dream?

Lots of love
Christel Joëlle

Growing up, monthly costs and physical health is something that kept not only my brain but also my body feeling ... not like itself. I was tired all the time and when I did a blood test, It showed I was completely healthy... But what was then the cause of this exhaustion?

Know that whatever happens in your life, it always happens for you, not to you! 

This blog is mainly about spirituality and life lessons... in my early days of blogging, I liked to add the occasional seasonal article. Halloween is right around the corner and even though I don't celebrate Halloween, I do love a good fall themed story.



Hiii Everyone, I am back! I know it has been a while. my planning ended up being a complete mess with my new job, my study, and the occasional photography sessions. But I am started to be back on track.

For this article, I wanted to share with you my favorite Fall themed books, series, and movies.

Fall is one of the most loved time of the years for bookworms like me. We love the leaves falling down the trees, the wind blowing outside while we stay in our warm homes filled with blankets, pillows, candles, books and a good cup of coco-coffee or thee by our sides.
When I think of fall I feel like it is time to lay a little low and not over analyzing my feelings. Rather I'd like to go back to my roots, do research on the feminity and look back at my year.


Let's start off with books! I am gonna mentions some books from a while ago because lately, I haven't had the time to really read.

The first book is Woman Who Run With The Wolves. Now this book, for me, is not an easy read. It is in English and talked about myths, stories and so much more concerning the Wild Woman Archetype. I am not very far, but I love it and it brings me back to my roots as a woman.

To keep going in the English book department, of course, I have to mention the Harry Potter series. I have wanted to buy the English version for so long, and as soon as I get my salary I will buy all the books!

Now Movies!

Of course the Harry Potter series! What I love the most in the movies are the mystic and the music!
 ... I thought I would know more movies but... uhm... I really don't know at this moment hih.

What movies do you like to watch during fall? Really in need of some inspiration haha :)

Okay, Series I do have some that I actually like!

-The Grimm. It is spooky, yet funny, gross too! Love it
-Sleepy Hollow!!
-On a more fun note, Lucifer.
-The Good Witch. These series are not creepy at all, it's just fun and entertaining.
-And For my anime lovers out there, I really liked Little Witch Academia!

I would love to hear your suggestions! Please Do Tell! :)

With lots of love,
Christel Joëlle